Preparing Heart and Home
March 28, 2011 § 5 Comments
“If you will prepare your heart and mind before your adoption, then you can avoid some of the disillusionment that many adoptive parents and children have experienced. Spend more time in prayer and take advantage of the wonderful resources that can help you understand your child’s special needs and the enormous amount of work that lies ahead. If you do, the challenges will be the same, but you will be less likely to be blindsided by them.” (Successful Adoption, A Guide for Christian Families)
Besides getting a crib and a few other baby things, thus far, we have been taking the advice of this book and have been focusing most of our time and energy preparing ourselves psychologically for the change that is to come by reading and through prayer.
In our reading we keep coming across phrases like “expect the unexpected,” “be flexible” and “don’t assume it will be love at first sight.” We’ve been warned about the exhaustion and feeling like everything is “out of control” that we will experience post-adoption — things any new parent goes though. But, we’ve also been made aware of other issues that we will need to consider like jet lag, racial issues, language barriers and health concerns such as lice and scabies that are often contracted at orphanages. That’s not to say the huge emotional highs and lows we will go through as we meet our child for the first time and learn to bond to them.
Although we don’t know if our baby is born yet or if its birthmother is still doing a full on waddle, we do know that this is a crucial time for babyzooks development. We have been covering the birthmother (and/or father) with prayer for protection, God’s presence and peace. Here is a passage I keep pondering:“I am your Creator. You were in my care even before you were born… don’t be terrified! You are my chosen servant, my very favourite. I will bless the thirsty land by sending streams of water; I will bless your descendants by giving them my Spirit. They will spring up like grass or like willow trees near flowing streams. They will worship me and become my people. They will write my name on the back of their hands. ” Isaiah 44:2-5
Now that the hump of paperwork is done — we can have some fun. In just a couple weeks our dossier will be complete and we can send it to Congo whereas we will then be matched with a child (our referral) within 0-3 months and finally be able to put a face to this place in our hearts!
This will also mean that I will be able to start shopping for gender specific baby gear. And all my girlfriends say, “Amen!”